Being Curious Will Improve All Your Relationships: Here’s How to Do It

I know you’ve heard that curiosity killed the cat, but that negative spin is all wrong! We know from the research that curiosity will help with everything from improving your relationships, to coping better with rejection to feeling happier and more fulfilled in your life. In the last thirty years, we’ve amassed a lot of great research illustrating the benefits of curiosity. In fact, describing a day you felt curious will boost your mental and physical state by 20% more than if you told me about a day you felt incredibly happy! Today we’re going to discuss the biggest benefits of curiosity and my top tips for easily being more curious in all your relationships.

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Research and Resources for Being Curious Will Improve All Your Relationships

Min Jeong Kang, et al. The Wick in the Candle of Learning, Psychological Science, Vol 20 No. 8

Bromberg-Martin ES, Hikosaka O. Midbrain dopamine neurons signal preference for advance information about upcoming rewards. Neuron. 2009 Jul 16;63(1):119-26. doi: 10.1016/j.neuron.2009.06.009. PMID: 19607797; PMCID: PMC2723053.

Gruber, M. J., Gelman, B. D., & Ranganath, C. (2014). States of Curiosity Modulate Hippocampus-Dependent Learning via the Dopaminergic Circuit. Neuron, 84(2), 486-496. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuron.2014.08.060

Padulo, C., Marascia, E., Conte, N., Passarello, N., Mandolesi, L., & Fairfield, B. (2022). Curiosity Killed the Cat but Not Memory: Enhanced Performance in High-Curiosity States. Brain Sciences, 12(7). https://doi.org/10.3390/brainsci12070846

Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy by Dr. Abby Medcalf

Gruber MJ, Gelman BD, Ranganath C. States of curiosity modulate hippocampus-dependent learning via the dopaminergic circuit. Neuron. 2014 Oct 22;84(2):486-96. doi: 10.1016/j.neuron.2014.08.060. Epub 2014 Oct 2. PMID: 25284006; PMCID: PMC4252494.

Mussel, P. (2013). Introducing the construct curiosity for predicting job performance. Journal of Organizational Behavior, 34(4), 453-472. https://doi.org/10.1002/job.1809

Fandakova, Y., & Gruber, M. J. (2021). States of curiosity and interest enhance memory differently in adolescents and in children. Developmental Science, 24(1), e13005. https://doi.org/10.1111/desc.13005

Christopher Peterson , Willibald Ruch , Ursula Beermann , Nansook Park & Martin E. P. Seligman (2007) Strengths of character, orientations to happiness, and life satisfaction, The Journal of Positive Psychology, 2:3, 149-156, DOI: 10.1080/1743976070122893

Hardy, J. H., Ness, A. M., & Mecca, J. (2017). Outside the box: Epistemic curiosity as a predictor of creative problem solving and creative performance. Personality and Individual Differences, 104, 230-237. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2016.08.004

Curious?: Discover the Missing Ingredient to a Fulfilling Life by Todd B. Kashdan

Kawamoto, T., Ura, M., & Hiraki, K. (2017). Curious people are less affected by social rejection. Personality and Individual Differences, 105, 264-267. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2016.10.006

Todd B. Kashdan and John E. Roberts. Trait and State Curiosity in the Genesis of Intimacy: Differentiation From Related Constructs. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology Volume 23 Issue 6 Dec 2004. https://doi.org/10.1521/jscp.23.6.792.54800

Kashdan, T. B., McKnight, P. E., Fincham, F. D., & Rose, P. (2011). When curiosity breeds intimacy: Taking advantage of intimacy opportunities and transforming boring conversations. Journal of Personality, 79(6), 1369. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-6494.

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