Today I’m coming at you with my top 5 tips for dealing with those people who get under your skin!
First things first: I could teach you 100 quick tips for dealing with people who get on your last nerve, but if you don’t remember to use the tools, they really don’t help. This means that you have to work on your self-awareness and your mindfulness.
To help you along, I’m going to give you my Mindfulness Tips Starter Kit! You can download it below.
However, even if you’re not a self-aware, mindful ninja, you can practice these quick tips to deal with anyone who’s bugging the you know what out of you.
Tip #1: Do you want to die on that hill?
Picking your battles is important but sometimes it’s hard to know when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em. Should you say something every time your boundary is crossed in some way?
Tip #2: Assume when, not if
In my experience, people are way too optimistic when it comes to how other people will act. Be prepared. Think, “When X, then I’ll Y.”
Think, “If my coworker makes a nasty remark, then I’m going to say, ‘I’m not clear why you’d say something so hurtful to me.’” Or “If my dad says I shouldn’t be offended when he teases me about my weight, then I’ll let him know that I will no longer tolerate this kind of behavior and I’ll leave.”
Tip #3: Remember it’s a choice to stay
What’s keeping you in this relationship anyway? The thought of what you’ve put into it? Your fear of loss and being alone?
Tip #4: Choose and be consistent
You want to be very consistent in your actions with those people who bug you. What you don’t want to do is intermittently reinforce their unwanted behavior because this is the most powerful type of reinforcement there is and they’ll keep doing whatever they’re doing and never stop!
Tip #5: Find the Love
This is really at the heart of everything (pun intended). I need you to put yourself in the other person’s shoes and find the love to change your interaction. I’m talking here about developing empathy for the person who’s bugging the shit out of you.
Resources and Links:
Four Ways to be More Self Aware
How to Make Mindfulness a Habit
You’ve Got to Have High Standards and Low Expectations
Learn How to Draw Effective Boundaries
Start Practicing Loving Detachment
Want to get really great at mindfulness? Enter your name and email below to check out my Mindfulness Starter Tool Kit.
Ready to find out what goes on inside that crazy mind of Abby’s?
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