Today I’m going to talk about why you need to have high standards and low expectations.

The big problem is that most people have it reversed. They have low standards but high expectations. In other words, most people will accept all kinds of bad behavior from other people (low standards), but then they’re pissed that they’re being treated that way (high expectations).

If you want a happy and fulfilled life, you’ve got to identify your standards and stick to them while you balance keeping your expectations low.

Top Take-A-Ways

  • To figure out your standards, you need to first identify something called your dealbreaker because your standards stem from your dealbreaker.
  • Your dealbreaker is really your core. It’s the one thing that, if it’s not there, you have mentally left that job, relationship, or situation.
  • Figuring out your dealbreaker will help you tremendously, because it will help you focus on what’s real for you and what’s truly important.
  • Your standards should all flow from your dealbreaker, or your core.

The bottom line: No one can be perfect which means it’s impossible for your standards to be met 100% of the time.

There are three important things to think about when you’re standard isn’t met:

  • Don’t take it personally if your standard isn’t met occasionally
  • Give a mulligan when you can
  • When your standard’s not met, and it’s happened more than once, remind your partner of your standard.

Remind your partner (in a kind way) of your standard when it’s not met, and problem-solve and communicate with them, so you can get what you need as consistently as possible.


Resources and Links:

Abby Medcalf Thriving YouTube Channel


If you’re ready to get clear on your dealbreaker, standards, and expectations, enter your name and email below to download the free worksheet.

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